My 250…-Doug the Neighbor-
“Step on the scale.”
The Doctor ordered. I did. The scale went from 0–250 faster then a lizard on a hot sidewalk.
“Yikes.” I said.
“You are no longer Doug the Neighbor. You are Doug the Neighbor-Hood.” The Doctor wrote something down.
“You ate too much and you did not do enough exercise. Simple. Your BMI…Body Mass Index is too high to count. You are just a Big Mass.”